There's Cheating, and Then There's Being an Idiot
by Captain of the Seven Skies
Summary: Allen and Naruto meet at a casino. They bond over crappy mentors.


Don't own D. Gray-Man.

Don't own the Cover Art.

There's Cheating, and Then There's Being an Idiot

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><p>"What do you think you're doing, Ero-sennin?" Naruto bellowed, swiping at his teacher and growling as the man jumped over the attack without even looking at him. "Give me back Gama-chan!" Honestly, he huffed to himself. They hadn't even been on the road for a month yet and the old pervert had stolen his money pouch at least ten times already! Just because he could get the money back easily enough didn't mean it should be taken all of the time.<p>

"I'm teaching you a valuable lesson about money management, brat!" Jiraiya said with a laugh, waving Gama-chan tauntingly in front of the blonde. He growled at him, his eyes flashing just the slightest red in his frustration, before turning and stalking off to the nearest casino. He might as well start trying to get that money back now.

He opened the door to the casino to see a man go crashing into the wall. The guy groaned in pain, and Naruto swung his head around to look for the perpetrator before he froze.

The guy in front of him only looked a few years older than him, with chin length white hair and grey eyes. A red mark ran vertically across his left eye, and the smile on his face was both overly polite and darkly amused. It made Naruto shiver a little as the teen's smile widened and he began looking around at the people surrounding him.

"Does anyone else want to accuse me of being a filthy cheater?" He asked lightly, rubbing his hands together as if to remove a stain from them. Silence greeted his question and his smile lost its ominous edge. "Good." He sat down again and, drawn to him out of curiosity, Naruto took the newly vacated seat at his table.

The teen gave him a warm smile and nodded to him. "Welcome to the table. I'm Walker Allen. And you?"

Naruto grinned at him. "Uzumaki Naruto." Allen had a rather weird name; Naruto wondered what it meant but thought it best not to ask then. They played a few games then, and Naruto watched as the smile on Allen's face grew a bit more devious as time went on and the only people winning were him and Naruto, though the blonde was surprised to see that he wasn't winning all of the games.

He'd started out doing well but as the game progressed he got only average or fairly good hands, where Allen received similar hands. The rest of the day dragged on in that fashion until Allen smiled and stood up, bidding them goodbye and striding out of the casino. Naruto hesitated a little after that, winning five more games before he stood up and left too.

He found Allen sitting leaned up against a wall near the casino, shuffling through his own pack of cards in a continuous rhythm. Naruto stared at the movement for a while before he scowled a little. "You _were_ cheating."

Allen laughed at that and stopped shuffling, the cards disappearing in an instant. "Of course I was," he scoffed. "It's not a question of who's cheating and who isn't in poker. It's a question of who's being obvious about it and who isn't. Or who's too stupid to successfully cheat without getting caught." Here he smirked mockingly at Naruto, who growled slightly at him.

"Well someone caught you earlier, didn't he?" Naruto snapped back, and Allen laughed.

"He didn't see me cheat once. I could see it in his eyes; he was bluffing and hoping I'd crack." The white-haired teen smiled darkly. "It'd take more than some sniveling drunkard to catch me cheating." Allen then paused slightly, a curious expression appearing on his face, and turned to Naruto. "So what are you doing here? You clearly haven't been gambling for long, considering your _honorable_ approach to it all."

He said 'honorable' as it the mere thought of it was ridiculous and Naruto resisted the urge to whine at him and sat on the ground beside the older boy. "My stupid teacher stole my money to go spend it on women and booze."

Allen looked somewhat surprised by that, then a smile began to grow on his face. "And let me guess; instead of actually teaching you anything, he just sits around doing fuck all and won't lift a hand to help you if you ask."

Naruto gaped at him. "Exactly! How did you…"

"My mentor did that too," he confided, looking more amusedly resigned than actually angry about it. "For years we travelled the world under the guise of him "training" me, when all he was really doing was picking up women, getting drunk off his ass and throwing his debt collectors at me so that I would pay them off with _my_ hard-earned money. Occasionally he'd teach me something; I sure as hell learned to dodge as he threw beer bottles at me."

Naruto stared at him in mute horror. This guy sounded worse than Ero-sennin! "And I thought I had it bad," he muttered, earning him a laugh from the white-haired teen.

They spent the rest of the day talking about their horrible mentors, and Allen eventually began teaching Naruto various ways to cheat at poker and other card-based gambling games. "The biggest thing is the poker face," he told Naruto softly, cards flipping erratically through his fingers, the Jack of Spades, the Queen of Hearts, the Four of Clubs. "Whether the hand you hold is incredible or terrible, hide your real feelings from everyone behind a metaphorical mask that you'll wear. Mine is a happy façade; you just need to find the one that suits you."

Naruto nodded thoughtfully at that. It was actually a very good technique, and not just for gamblers. It was very advantageous for ninja to have a mask that hid their true feelings. He sometimes used one as a kid, appearing happier than he was with his crappy situation. He decided to keep his cheerful face as his poker face; it'd be easier to maintain that way.

Naruto then squawked indignantly as Allen held up a roll of bills that Naruto realized were his. "The next rule," the white-haired teen continued with a grin, "is for general life; don't keep all of your money in one place. If you do, it leaves you in a tight place if you're pickpocketed or if your mentor steals your wallet again. Make the bastard work to get his grubby paws on your money." Allen grinned sadistically, and Naruto mirrored the look with a mischievous one of his own.

He definitely enjoyed talking with Allen. Maybe he could travel with them?

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><p>Well, that was brief. It would've been longer, but I was hopelessly distracted by other fanfic ideas.<p>

If you liked it, tell me what else you'd like to see, or how you think I can improve.


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